I used to be queen bee of cussing, saying inappropriate things, and could find something negative in every situation or person. I'm so appreciative that I've taught myself how to flip the script and change my language so that my outlook is far more positive!
I'm not going to stand (let's get real...I'm sitting in my bed) here and tell you that I don't ever cuss, make a dirty joke, or have a negative word slip out of my mouth now. It still happens from time to time but not in excess and not from a place of not having control. When we can learn to be in control of the way we speak about ourselves and others it opens up a world of possibilities.
It all boils down to switching your negative language into a positive one. It's a simple strategy that can be implemented in so many ways which I'll touch on below. Then you can start seeing the world through glasses that are a little more rose colored.
Eventually this new language becomes habit and you'll find yourself getting rid of older negative language that kept your mind in a worse off space. The key is to not expect yourself to cut the crap overnight, it's a gradual transition. Just as if you were to learn a new language like Spanish or German it takes repetition and incorporating those words into your daily life so that you can relate to them.
Here are some steps to start flipping your own script:
1) Start listening to language.
You can start trying to listen to how often you speak positively or negatively about yourself, others, situations, or places. This might be a little tricky to pick up on at first so also consider listening to how other people speak. Be an unbiased listener with no emotional ties to the words and see what you pick up on.
2) Bring on the key words.
Start incorporating uplifting keywords or phrases into your daily speaking or writing. I am beautiful. I am kind. This is awesome! I am grateful for... Tailor these to whatever resonates with you most. Say them in your head, out loud, to someone else, to yourself in a mirror, etc. Just start saying them often!
3) Watch out for sneaky negatives.
Sometimes negative thoughts or words don't seem outright mean but rather they can be riddled with doubt. We want to shift away from I can't, I try, it's hard, I'm not, I'll never, impossible, etc. I'm doing things now I used to be convinced weren't possible, and it's all because of a change in language which leads to a change in mindset.
4) Be mindful of your company.
The company you keep has a huge influence on you! If you start to notice the people you're around speak negatively pretty often you may want to find a new tribe, make a little distance, or even point it out to them or speak in a more positive manner to help them do the same!
5) Say it until you believe it.
Don't get this one twisted thinking that you need to "fake it until you make it" or that the positive words are a lie you're making yourself believe, because that's just not true. Getting more positive might feel new and awkward at first but with practice you will say amazingly nice things to yourself and others with strength in your voice.
6) Get used to the replacing game at first.
Don't expect the initial negative thoughts to just disappear for a little while. It's okay that they pop in there for a second, but it's up to you to decide to replace it with something more positive. After a while you'll notice that you don't say those nasty thoughts nearly as often if at all.